JJ BANKS’ Blog

The Bloodhound Gang

     My guess is that it had been about 3 years since I last saw these perverts before seeing them once again in West Chester, PA on February 14th at The Note. And just like 3 years ago “The Gang” sounded like they hadn’t missed a beat. How do they stay so fresh and solid? Easy there’s a place called Europe where they spend most of their days now.Â
   Â
     But as for this show on this night back in The States, I’d say they played a nice mixture of their old and new stuff. The venue for the show, The Note, is a really cool place to see a show. A perfect small atmosphere that keeps you close to the action (like Evil Jared puking into his beer and then drinking it) no matter where you’re standing. The crowd was a lot younger and tamer then most Bloodhound Gang shows I had been to in the past, but I didn’t mind it that much because after one or two HopDevils the last thing I needed was a mosh pit throwing me around.

Evil Jared Hasselhoff warping your view on reality.

      So the question is “When should I expect to see The Bloodhound Gang?” Maybe when they release another album? I probably shouldn’t hold my breath then, because even as awesome as they are, these guys have been known to have the same motivation to make new music as Artie Lange has to quit eating donuts. But at any case, Bloodhound Gang, let me take this moment to thank you for all the awesome music you have made so far and to thank you even farther for maintaining your level of quality live performances. Saturday night was a blast…Sunday morning I felt like I had an ice pick in my brain…this is what seeing The Bloodhound Gang means to me.

Starship Troopers (1997)

Directed by: Paul Verhoeven

Rated: R

Runtime: 129 min

     “Starship Troopers” to me is one of the best science fiction movies of all-time. It gives you everything you want; great action, nudity, cool monsters and Michael Ironside.

 

     I learned last year that there was actually a trilogy to this movie so I went and watch the other two “ST” movies and here’s what I’ve got to report.

 

Starship Troopers 2: Hero of the Federation (2004)

Directed by: Phil Tippett

Rated: R

Runtime: 88 min

     Now this sequel was made 7 years later and with 5% of the budget from the original but that still doesn’t excuse this embarrassment of a motion picture. The beginning of the movie is absolutely laughable due to how poor it is with totally lame sets and VFX that look like they were made by a suburban teenager on his Mac. The feel and atmosphere of the original “Starship Troopers” is thrown in the trashcan for a storyline that feels like a crappy horror film. What’s even worst than some of the VFX are the horribly coordinated action/fight sequences.

     The one shining moment in this film is that Kelly Carlson/Pvt. Charlie Soda (the blonde above) does get completley nude but that’s really the only positive thing I have to say about “ST2″.

Starship Troopers 3: Marauder (2008)

Directed by: Edward Neumeier

Rated: R

Runtime: 105 min

     Now here is the real sequel to “Starship Troopers (1997)”! Directed by Edward Neumeier, who was the screenwriter for the original, the universe and world of the roughnecks truly lives on in this film. Hell, even Casper Van Dien is back as Johnny Rico. Yes, the style, the action, the nudity and everything that made you love the first one is back, and guess what this movie didn’t have a huge budget either, but yet somehow Neumeier found a way to make it work.

     If you loved the first one then you’ll really dig this; the Federal Network propaganda ads, awesome bugs with great action sequences and there’s even a new superweapon that bears the same name as the subtitle of the film. “Starship Troopers 3″ was my surprise film of 2008 and I’m anxious to think what the Starship Troopers Universe could be like with another film and maybe this one could get back to the $100 million budget of the first one. Imagine the possibilites!

                                                                                                                           Niko Bellic, my friend from Liberty City.

The following is a letter I received from a friend of mine named Niko Bellic. He’s one of those Russian guys who always seems to have money. Hell, he’s only in his 30’s and he’s already retired. He writes me once and awhile to let me know what he’s been up to.

Dear JJ,

     Retired living is going good. I spend most of my time trying to stay busy so I don’t dwell on the past. Lately, I’ve been going around Liberty City shooting pigeons. I see at as a way to help clean up the city and also use up all this extra ammunition I have laying around. I actually killed my 200th pigeon or flying rat as what I like to call them the other night so I called up my friend Little Jacob to go celebrate.

                                                                                                                                 Niko’s friend Little Jacob

     I picked Jacob at 10:00pm in my all black Infernus, my favorite car in all the world. Jacob as always was glowing like Chernobyl and we headed over to The Triangle Club for some good dancing of the lap. Jacob babbled the whole ride over but thankfully for the Infernus the ride from Algonquin to Bohan didn’t take long. I enjoyed many lap dance and even a threesome in the backroom for only $250…I love this country!! Meanwhile, Jacob spent the whole time smoking and he could barely walk out to the car when we left at 7:44am.

     We got breakfast at Burger Shot and I dropped Jacob off. I headed home and slept in until 6:00pm. Just another beautiful day as a retiree in LC. - NB